It's that time of year!
For gratitude, turkey, and heartfelt messages.
The last week or so has been a collection of opposing forces, and I'm happy to say I've made it through relatively unscathed.
We went on vacation to the Florida Keys where the weather was warm and beautiful, and came back to snow flying in Nashville on Monday.
We deposited my uncle's ashes in the Gulf of Mexico, which was something of a relief after the last five months. We found out the next morning that my grandmother passed overnight at 98 years old.
We stayed in a beautiful house with immaculate grounds, heated pools, a small beach, and more than enough beds from Saturday to Monday, followed by a relatively small condo with a cold pool and a jetty.
The last week and half has taken me through a whole rainbow of emotions. And I'm grateful that I was able to experience and enjoy all of this.
Yes, even the freezing cold pool.
I'm grateful that I got to heat and then eat a pre-made Publix Thanksgiving dinner with my parents and my in-laws and my husband and kids. I grateful for the family members who I've reconnected with in the past several months. I'm grateful that my grandmother has found peace.
I'm telling you all this not because I want to brag about my fancy Thanksgiving vacation, or elicit sympathy for the recent passings in my family. I'm sharing this with you because writing is how I process events and learn more about myself. And without it, I don't know that I could handle all these things. Writing and tons of therapy, of course.
Tamara of five or ten years ago would've been something of a mess during and after this week
. Tamara of today is still something of a mess, but a mess that works it out in less self-destructive ways. A mess that can hold it together well enough to get two, and sometimes four, letters out a month. A mess that doesn't cry nearly as much. A mess that wrote and revised a novel, and is making big plans for the upcoming year.
I don't often stray from my usual format, but this is going to be one of those weeks. No recs, no Editor's Note. Just me recapping a week of gratitude and joy and sadness. Thank you for being here and witnessing it with me.
